I am learning so much lately.  I’ve been learning what it’s like to not obsess over food.  I never even realized how much of an obsession food has been in my life until now.  My thought patterns were created and cemented in my head during childhood.  Only lately have I come to realized just how much of my waking hours were devoured by thoughts about food, actually eating and obsessing over losing weight.  (I also realized that I never, ever dream about any of that when I sleep, which I find very interesting.)  I guess to some degree I believed what I thought and felt about food was normal.  I didn’t realize that there was another way for me to think.  My thinking patterns were so ingrained in fact, that until they started changing due to the hypnosis, I honestly didn’t know the patterns were there, much less how destructive to my mind, heart and body they were.

As my thinking changes, my life is changing dramatically.  The weight is melting off, (30 pounds so far) but surprisingly enough, as it’s happened, it’s become secondary to me, which I never would have dreamed to be the case.  More important to me are the things I’m learning about myself.  Like that for the last few years, I’ve used food to avoid life itself.  And that actually feeling my feelings is so much better than stuffing them. 

Also, I knew like everyone, I could use a little more self-respect and self-love, but I never realized exactly how hard I’ve been on myself.  I didn’t see how constantly berating myself over not being able to lose weight in the past was beaten me down.  It was like a big dark cloud that hung over my life and I was so used to it being there that I didn’t even realize it was dark.  That feeling of overcast had become my default position with me smiling through the haze. 

I think part of the reason I was so oblivious to it was because in every other aspect of my life I’ve always been an optimist.  Regarding everything except my weight, it was my nature to find the bright side of things, because I never enjoyed feeling bad or indulging in self-pity.  When I found the Law Of Attraction through Abraham-Hicks, I discovered a whole philosophy based on feeling good.  No wonder it spoke to my soul the way it has. 

I understood that according to Abe, I can “be do or have” anything I want, yet for years I’ve grappled with why I couldn’t change my thinking to allow myself to let go of the weight once and for all.  It was like this big black hole for me and I couldn’t see a way out of it.  I now realize it’s because unless we know what we are thinking, we can’t change it.  I honestly wasn’t aware of how much of my mind was involved in my obsession or how negative and subversive my thinking was about myself. 

However as seeds of optimism, self-love and new thinking are being planted in my subconscious mind through hypnotherapy, I’ve started to become aware of my thoughts, they are coming to light.  It’s usually very subtle, I’ll just realize I’ve been thinking differently about something, or something has been easier.  Sometimes it comes in huge flashes of awareness and I’m dumbstruck how something a thought pattern I’ve felt for so long has changed and no longer applies to my life.  Or I will be delighted when I realize that I’m developing a genuine desire for something I never liked before or had any desire for in the past.

The basis of Law of Attraction is what you focus on, you attract.  But until hypnotherapy, I never understood I could change my thoughts, much less how to do it.  So discovering an active way to bring them to light has been wonderful for me.  I love hypnosis, I love how good I feel when I leave his office.  I love how my confidence is building, and how effortless that seems to feel.  I love getting to know myself better and feeling better and better in my own skin, my own life. 

I love that I don’t feel obsessive or compulsive about food and eating anymore.  I love that for the first time I can remember in my life, the black cloud is dissipating, it’s growing lighter and lighter and fading away. 

Much love,

Tigerlily